Dry.

My last year in film school starts in a week.

I feel like the holidays just swept me by in a limbo. I've worked and worked (though I've yet to see the money and I'm broke as holy hell.) and slept and ate. I've contemplated so many things but done nothing. I've only jogged a grand total of 4 times in 3 months. I still haven't quit smoking. I've done nothing remotely exciting or new. I've lost faith in seeing anyone anymore. I feel like my memory is primarily selective and lapses easily. That I am horrid with sentiments and would rather choose to roll my eyes with cynicism. I feel like the only thing I have done is daydream and imagine things to work for itself without much effort. I hate it that the year's been nothing but news of deaths.

I need some order in my life like how I've forced myself to take my meds accordingly.