Pet peeves.
For every dollar I get when an Ugly Singaporean shoved his/her way into the MRT door while I'm trying to get out, I will be able to afford a five-room HDB flat. Sometimes I imagined Ally Mcbealesque scenarios like turning into the Incredible Hulk and charging towards them, or like in a rugby match at the Singapore Sevens. Sometimes I fear they'd charge in before I could get out, and I'll miss my station and I'll get crushed and become The Boy That Was. You will never hear from me ever again. Sometimes I thought of holding a placard that says "Give Way For Passengers Getting Out Of The Train. By Law. Or Fined $1."
But I think signs are not working for fines-fearing, signs-abiding citizens. Either that, or they can't read English. Or maybe the signs are not big enough. Singaporeans are a myopic lot. Maybe we need neon signs and billboards to remind them to keep-fucking-left (maybe a reminder to have more sex, too. according to durex, we ain't gettin' enough love. but that's another story altogether.) on the escalator. Or maybe they can't tell the difference between left or right. They should have a line on the escalator that seperates left and right.
But then again, they do have yellow lines that tell you to make way for Passengers Getting Out Of The Train, or PGOOTT, since Singaporeans love acronyms. Oh wait. Those lines and arrows are just for decorative purposes, are they not? Surely they do not serve to remind us to be courteous citizens who give ways for others.
I've thought of doing up art installations around MRT stations all over Singapore with huge billboards, or just many, many many signs that says keep left on escalators and to give way for PGOOTT. I believe that is the solution for these numskulls to wake up and smell the coffee and make way for PGOOTT. There are simply not enough signs, we need many, many more. NAC should fund my idea, rather than having wasted it on Lee Tzay Chuen's empty space at the Venice Biennale.
Maybe I should really do this, and film it. Like some reality-documentary. Like Michael Moore. At the end of the series, viewers can guess if it's a no-go. People will be waiting at train stations wondering if the installations will be put up, the attention ensued will bring an island-wide courtesy wake-up call more fucking successful than that stupid retro-looking lion.
Don't steal my idea. (Writing this entry spontaneously churned out that last paragraph. I'm actually quite excited by the possibilities. Who knows?)
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