Fabulously Lazy.

Apologies for the infrequent updates. Anyhow, here I am.

I have what I would call, lazy passion. Yes I am some aspiring film-maker - gawd I feel embarassed just saying that now - I am the ricebowl for all Film-making For Dummies authors. Except I am not. When the least I should have done is contribute to their salaries. All I had ever done was sat down on my arse and imagining I will eventually be Shyamalan/SamMendes/Whoever. I have done nothing for myself. Is it friggin' army? My consistently downflow of financial well-being (to fund my imaginery independent projects)? It's not. It's just me sitting down on my arse waiting for a video camera to fall from the sky. And last week, a slap on my face woke me up. I am just a darn junior college grad with an A'Level cert to boot. No one will fucking care! It wasn't something I was particularly proud of, by the way. I deserve the rejection. At that moment, I thought I came across as a young, amateur, immature, naive and totally himbotic kid trying to make it big in the adult world. I had never felt so embarassed. I should be.

I think I am just ranting like a headless lizard running about here. Just ignore my current state of mind.

(To cut the long story short, I was rejected from my unit's video production crew. Too leh-cheh and boring to talk about. So allow me to spare you from the boredom.)

So I shall smell the coffee from now on. There's Fly-by-Night which I feel compelled to join. Objectifs is having a short film course which I want to attend. But it's on Wednesdays. Two sessions only. I don't know if friggin' army will be flexible enough though.

I am still ranting to myself.

*

"but for now
it's the unprotected and
vulnerable it follows
gravity's blind command
it has lost its home
the clouds the close
proximity to the sky."

-Gunther Uecker

Was at his exhibition today. (Gunther Uecker: Man's Inhumanity; NAFA, 80 Bencoolen Street. Free, running through mid-November) Through sculptures, poetry and paintings, he attempts to portray the tendency of violence and xenophobia in Man. Terms that depicts acts of hate from Man to another Man used in the Testament were written in freeflow on the wall, which was an ironic juxtaposition to the wooden pickets and nails lying around on the floor. Do visit when you can spare the time.

[earwax]: Alicia Keys - Streets of New York (City life)(unplugged);Franz Ferdinand- Tell Her Tonight